3 years ago today

3 years ago today.  i've been sitting here for a few minutes trying to come up with something to say about the anniversary.  i just looked through my "memory boxes" and found some letters and notes she wrote me, and what seems most striking now is that my mom always made me feel like i was important. i was living in the dorms at mtsu - a mere 45 minutes away from the rest of my family - yet the way she expressed missing me in these letters, it was like i lived across the ocean and only got to see her once a year.  and now i can't even put into words what this missing feels like.  

i tried to scan some of these notes onto the computer, but the scanner isn't working.  so you won't get to see all the cute stickers on the letter, but here are the words:

you know that i miss you so much. so does dad, and so does courtney. and so does carrie. i love you when it's sunny and cloudy and when the stars are out. you make my heart. may all of the angels watch over you always, and drop stars and rainbows and love in your lap! 

here's another one: 

under the same sun, under the same stars, under the same moon, under the same curly q's. no matter where we are...i love you xoxo